Tonight's Insight: Feelings

Sundays tend to be challenging days for me lately because I'm very often alone for most of the day. As someone with strong extrovert tendencies, this often leads to strong feelings of loneliness. Today was no different until this evening.

This evening, I made the decision (and succeeded in carrying it out) to go for a walk in the rain. Though it was barely raining when I walked and I didn't walk very far, the physical sensations of the wind and rain on my skin helped to assuage the emotional turmoil inside of me.  I'm thinking that perhaps when my body is lacking in physical sensation, my brain responds by triggering my heart to feel too much.

Thus begins my experiment. When I sense the emotions becoming overwhelming, I will seek out safe and appropriate physical stimulation to help me cope in a healthier way for myself and for those around me.

CHANGE - to be Feared or Friended

I'm in a situation right now that is somewhat unique to me. In the past, Change has often been thrust upon me by the choices of others. Right now, I am facing a Change that I have worked really hard to bring about. Yet, I found myself filled with the same fear and anxiety over this Change as I have previous Changes.

As I worked to replace my fear with faith, I pondered the cause of the fear. Sure, there were reasons/excuses for it. However, in all honesty, the fear stemmed simply from preconditioning. Recognizing this, I became determined to overcome that preconditioning.

I've heard it said that Change is one of the few things we can count on in this life. Perhaps because Death and Taxes are the other things spoken of as being unavoidable, our society in general seems to view Change as a negative thing.

I thought briefly of the Changes that have occurred, that were thrust upon me, in the last four years and, in truth, I am grateful for where those Changes have led me. With this in mind, I've decided that it's time for me to embrace Change as a friend.

Change has been a blessing in my life. Change has helped me become who I am today and I really do like myself. True Change is challenging. Change helps us to grow and to gain the experience required to become our best selves especially when we allow Christ to be our guide.

Independence Day

Before rising on the morning of July 4, 2013, I came across a quote from Nelson Mandela. He said, "As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I'd still be in prison." Nelson Mandela internalized a truth that is foreign in our world today. On the day he was released from the physical prison that held him, he declared in his heart his Independence from bitterness and hatred. I believe we have Independence Days that we do celebrate and many more potential and individual Independence Days that we fail to recognize for what they are. 

Many countries throughout the world have a day on which they recognize and celebrate declaring and/or obtaining their Independence from another country. My country, the United States of America, declared Independence from England on July 4, 1776, 237 years ago. We celebrate with parades, carnivals, fireworks, and family get togethers. 

On Easter each year, Christians throughout the world celebrate the Resurrection of Jesus Christ. When Christ suffered for our sins and rose from the dead, He declared Independence from death for all who lived, live or will live on this earth as well as from sin for all who accept His gift and grace.

There are many milestones throughout an individual's life that can be considered personal Independence Days. When an infant begins crawling and then walking, they are declaring Independence from having to be carried everywhere. When we learn to talk, we declare Independence to communicate in a language common to those around us. As we are potty trained, we declare Independence from diapers. Later, as we graduate from High School and College, we declare our Independence from formal schooling. The list of these types of Independence Days could be much longer, but there is another kind of Independence that I'd like to discuss.

How many of us have been imprisoned by our own and/or others' choices? Can we too declare Independence from those things that hold us bond? I declare that we can. This is part of the gift of Christ's grace.

In my own life, I've had many opportunities to declare personal Independence and to watch others do the same. I've watched as loved ones have chosen the difficult path of declaring Independence from addictions and seen the great joy that has been their reward as they have progressed down this path. As a teenager and young adult, I declared Independence from a terrible temper. In 2009, I declared Independence from an abusive marriage. I am in the process of declaring Independence from an addiction to food as well as from the effects of the various traumas I've experienced throughout my life. I'm supporting my daughter as she struggles to declare and gain Independence from her own traumatic past. 

I believe that as we open ourselves to the guidance of the Holy Spirit, we will be blessed with the strength to recognize and acknowledge the areas in our lives where declaring Independence will bring us and our loved ones closer to God and fill us with more peace and joy. It takes great courage; sometimes it even requires us to constantly recommit ourselves to the Independence, but the rewards of doing so far outweigh the efforts required. 

Let us all strive each day to declare Independence from those things that hold us bond in a way the betters us and the world around us.